Our baby boy, Noah was born on 10th November 2015 weighing 3lb 4oz at 29 weeks. It was a complete shock having our baby born prematurely after a normal pregnancy.
I always planned to breastfeed my baby, but when your baby is born early, it seems everything is taken out of your hands. You have to put every bit of faith into the wonderful Doctors and Nursing staff looking after your precious baby. One thing that I could do to help right from the beginning was express my milk. I remember being delighted when I expressed 0.3ml for the first time. I was very strict to myself, making sure Noah could have these tiny amounts of colostrum every hour. The more I expressed, the more I produced. The nurses were brilliant at giving me encouragement and I felt I was doing something to help our little Noah.
When Noah was 10 days old I was able to have skin to skin for the first time. Each day I would have kangaroo (skin to skin) cuddles with Noah, I loved having him tucked into my top, often, I used to express the most milk after having these cuddles. Leaving Noah in hospital was one of the hardest things I have ever done, broke my heart each day when I had to say good night to him, wishing I could just take him home. Once we had left the hospital each night, I would try and think positively about the next day and being able to see him again.
During Noah’s stay in hospital, I made sure I expressed 8-9 times per day, throughout the day and night. Setting my alarm twice at night. There is something very lonely about pumping on your own especially in the middle of the night when all you wish for is your baby to be with you. I used to ring the hospital for an update, my heart used to pound until they would tell me Noah was ok and if he wasn’t, I felt so tense, then I would start to worry that the tension would reduce my milk production. Some nights, I couldn’t express anything because I was tense, I would cuddle a warm wheat bag in bed along with Noah’s cuddly toy and blanket to try and get the milk production working again. These things always helped. I put a lot of pressure on myself but I was determined to make it work.
Noah first breastfed at 33 weeks, he fed for a few minutes and I remember being so surprised that my tiny little boy had the strength to be able to feed. I was thrilled. Of course, for some time after this, some days he would feed and others he couldn’t as he didn’t have the energy and was tube fed instead. Noah’s feeding tube stayed in up until we ‘roomed in’ prior to discharge where we began to establish breastfeeding.
Altogether, I expressed my milk for 8 weeks until the day Noah came home. It was hard work, at the beginning my pump was like my best friend, I wouldn’t go anywhere without it. Towards the end I hated it, I just wanted my baby to be able to breastfeed. I put every ounce of energy and determination into making it work and I am pleased to say I have been able to breastfeed my baby exclusively and we are still going today!
It’s been one of the biggest challenges of my life having a premature baby and breastfeeding him with the constant worries surrounding weight gain and reflux. There have been many days/ weeks where I have felt completely out of my depth wondering how I was going to make this happen, but I did and I am so proud of our little Noah.
With thanks to Sarah Weatherhead for sharing her story as part of our ‘Feeding a baby born too soon’ 2017 series 9-15th January.